I've heard thousands of business owners explain what they do, and some of the most polished introductions are also the hardest to refer.

They include words like solutions, transformation, innovation, quality and impact. They sound professional. They may be completely accurate.

And yet, when they're finished, I'm left thinking... yes, but who exactly am I looking for? How can I help you?

This matters because your network doesn't refer you while you're standing beside them explaining your business. The opportunity usually happens somewhere else, on another day, in a conversation you aren't part of.

Someone mentions a problem. Someone talks about a change in their business. Someone complains about something that isn't working. Your referral partner has a few seconds to make the connection between what they're hearing and you.

You've got to give them something they can recognise.

This is why I talk so much about WHO, HOW and WHAT.

WHO do you want to meet?

Not everyone who could possibly buy from you. Who is a genuinely good referral for you right now?

Then, HOW will I recognise them?

What will be happening in their business or their life? What situation might they be facing? Where might I meet them? What clues would tell me that this is somebody you could help?

And finally, WHAT might I actually hear them say?

That's where referral requests become much more useful.

Your ideal client probably isn't going to say, “I'm looking for an innovative strategic solution.”

They might say, “We're growing, but everything still depends on me.”

They might say, “We sent the proposal two weeks ago and haven't heard anything.”

Or perhaps, “I keep going to networking events, but I'm not getting anything from them.”

Now I have something to listen for.

There's a temptation when talking about our businesses to explain everything. We don't want to leave out a service or accidentally exclude a potential client, so we add more and more information until we've created a perfectly accurate description that nobody else can remember.

Your network doesn't need to memorise your website.

It needs enough clarity to recognise an opportunity.

A great test....

One of the simplest tests is to explain the referral you want to somebody who knows your business and then ask them to tell it back to you in their own words. If they can't, don't assume they weren't listening. You may have given them too much to remember.

Clarity isn't about making your business smaller. It's about making the opportunity easier to see.

Because the best referral request isn't necessarily the cleverest sentence in the room. It's the one somebody remembers on Tuesday morning when they're having exactly the right conversation.

So, could the people in your network tell me WHO you want to meet, HOW they'll recognise them and WHAT they might hear them say?

If they can, you've made referring you considerably easier.

Happy Connecting!

WLC